"open"

Open.... A word that I know well. Growing up my parents wanted me to be "open" with them, they wanted to support me to hear what I was thinking (obviously within reason and with respect) My siblings have all always been very "open" with me. Telling me when they thought I was being unwise, talking to me about my life and theirs.

Now this word... this "open" word has taken on a totally new meaning to me. In thinking about adoption, this word scared my husband and myself for a long while. It scared us because it seemed more like leaving a door open to unknown trouble more than leaving ourselves open to love. Now you're probably confused as to what I'm talking about... let me explain.

 

The person I'm referring to loving isn't our baby, we have no fears about loving the child to come, but there's another openness in adoption that before, seemed scary. Being open with the birth mother of our future child. Letting our child have an open relationship with their birth mother... it seemed absolutely terrifying if I'm honest. What if she didn't have the best living situation, what if she's escaping an abuse situation, what if she's a recovering drug addict, what if what if what if.... now I'm not saying that every birth mother potentially seeking adoption falls into these categories, but what if she does? That "what if" seemed so scary before because of the unknowns it brings.

 

But after reading story after story, talking to people on both sides of the fence and praying.... and praying and praying and praying....we have come to this conclusion.

 

What if she is one of those seemingly scary scenarios? What if she comes with baggage? Would we still be open? There are so many variables to this situation, but at this point I can say, that if being open with her doesn't bring direct harm to us or our child, and she wants some degree of openness, why wouldn't we be open? My husband and I are professing believers in Christ as our savior, and in being that I can't imagine turning my back on this woman. How is this not the perfect opportunity to show Gods love?

 

If I'm not mistaken Jesus had some seemingly questionable company at times, but He only wanted to show them love. No he didn't support them financially, or join in with their questionable activities, but He loved them and shared Gods love with them. He told them stories of salvation, and was an example to them of what a Christian is. He didn't turn His back on them because they didn't follow the moral code of the other supposed "good people". He was there for those who had lost their way in life.

 

Why can't we put ourselves aside to be there for an expectant mother who needs someone. Maybe she doesn't have a listening ear in someone she knows, maybe she just needs someone who loves her regardless of poor choices she's possibly made.

 

I don't know who our birth mother will be, I don't know what she will look like or what kind of life she will have. But we at this point have made a choice to love her regardless, just as we have made a choice to love a baby that we don't know yet. Just as God made a choice to love us regardless of who we are or what we've done.

 

Psalms 34:15 "The eyes of the LORD are toward the righteous and His ears are open to their cry."